Linguistically Speaking

Kulick argues that in sexual contexts, 'no' produces a feminine or subordinate subject position for the person who utters it. That is why 'no' may be construed (in the case of sadomasochism, must be) as submission rather than refusal; it is also why men who claim 'homosexual panic' are not necessarily asked whether, instead of physically attacking the man who approached them, they could not simply have said no. [...] [Thus], the utterance or non-utterance of 'no' in response to another's desire is performative of gender.